Bed Bugs

VERY ALARMING
My ability to snap snooze quickly on my alarm clock and do the fastest, most lucid math possible while entering a new wake-up time in the mornings is truly amazing. After all, I hate math - in all forms - especially TIME MATH! But there I am, half-asleep with pillow marks all over my face, and bed covers strewn - blazing through advanced time math problems as I race for more sleep. Truly remarkable.
ALARM AMBITION
Why do I set my alarm so early in the first place? Well, I apparently suffer from nighttime "I'm-going-to-wake-up-early-and-get-a-lot-of-stuff-done-before-work-wishful-but-totally-false-ambition-syndrome." And for the life of me, I don't know why I suffer from this condition EVERY SINGLE night.
DREAM/NIGHTMARES
Speaking of sleep, I haven't been getting much the last week - because I've been having nightmare dreams of work. These are the dreams when I'm at work - all hell's breaking loose - I'm missing feeds - people are angry at me - no one's doing anything right - and I'm fumbling under extreme stress. Then I wake up and have to really go to work, and that's when depression and hopelessness join up with me on my walk into the newsroom.
DOUBLE-EDGED SONYA
So with everyone's New Year's resolutions to get in shape and lose weight, my personal trainer has become a personal enigma. She sets up times with me to meet - and then by virtue of my wacky schedule or her over-booking - it won't work and we'll have to reschedule. Problem is, she has NO time to reschedule because she's booked with other clients like a month ahead of time. It feels like I'm trying to make that elusive gynecological appointment! Anyway, she's booked solid - my schedule's unpredictable - and I haven't seen her in about a month. Something's gotta give, and it may just be my ice cream willpower.