Mistaken

My hair was so much of a bird's nest today that - while walking on 57th and Broadway - a pigeon actually flew into my head! The pigeon was confused, bystanders laughed, and I was mortified, heading straight to the store to get nearly every anti-frizz potion known to man.

Gmail Hilarity

So... I have a seldom-used gmail account that's been in operation for the past couple of years. I checked it just the other day, mainly to clear it out, and I noticed something peculiar. Apparently, a woman by the name of Shauna Ballo thinks we're friends; I'm on her mass emails, evites, etc...

I've been invited to some pretty scrumptious parties over the past year - and keep getting pictures of their child.

Here are some of the gmail emails:

8/30/07
Hi!

You've been invited to be a part of a recipe exchange; something a little different and fun.

Please send a recipe to the people whose name is listed in the number 1 &2 position below (even if you don't know them) and it should preferably be something quick, easy and without rare ingredients. Actually, the best one is one you know in your head and can type out and send right now. Then, copy this letter into a new e-mail, move my name to the number 1 position and put your name in the number 2 position. Only my and your name should show when you send your e-mail. Send to 20 friends. If you cannot do this within 5 days, let me know so it will be fair to those participating. It's fun to see where they come from!!

Seldom does anyone drop out because we can all use new recipes. The turn around is fast because only 2 names are on the list.

10/9/07

We've finally updated our blog, check it out at: http://www.ballofamily.blogspot.com/

Great photos of the pumpkin patch and an adorable video clip of Audrey giggling, that's guaranteed to make you laugh and smile no matter what mood you're in. Be sure to have your speakers on.

Feel free to leave a "comment" after the blog post (like "Oh my god, that's the most beautiful baby ever" or "Oh my god, stop sending me photos of your baby already") so we know you were there.

how cute is this photo?











(Oh - and wait until you log onto the Ballo's blog - it's really something! that little Audrey is really coming along! Let me reiterate - I HAVE ZERO IDEA WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE!)

I'm not really sure what to do: Let them know they have the wrong person, or just go with it and become part of their extended family? After all, Audrey is pretty cute in that there pumpkin patch.

Total "Sucks in the City"

So very nicey lookingey doctory gentleman lives in an apartment one floor above me. I sometimes see him coming or going from building. We always exchange hellos, and he's always pretty eager to talk with me, which is nice.

Last night, we were on the elevator together and this is how our conversation went:

Him: "Cold out there." {lame but whatever}
Me: "Yeah - next month will likely be worse."
Him: "How long have you lived here?"
Me: "Since October"
Him: "Where did you live before that?"
Me: "I lived in the city - kinda near Hells Kitchen. I lived with someone there but live here by myself now."
Him: "Oh, that's rough."

As I walked out of the elevator I thought - why did he say "that's rough"? Then I thought - "Great - he thinks I just got out of a boyfriend relationship - when I meant just a roommate scenario."

He smells rebound. I smell NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Mister Big-Shot

Buddy Aaron is Mister Big-Shot - landing on the front of today's LA Times! Too bad Cindy's giving him the hairy eyeball.

Better than Aesop

We've all been there - trying to shake someone who seems a little "too interested" in us. I was thinking about this on the way home, and then remembered a hilarious story a friend once told me. I think I can remember the notable points.

He had a pseudo-dating thing going on with this girl a couple years ago and she was apparently waaaaaayyyyy more into him than he her. I think she was even stopping by his place unannounced. Yikes! As he reached suffocation-status, and approached her with the thought that he didn't want to see her anymore - he told her he had to go into Rehab - and that he would be unreachable for a few months.

This strategy in a city of 8M worked pretty well until she called him a few months later. He had long deleted her number - so he answered the call. Busted. Guess he had to come "clean."

Word of the Week

I hate my newsroom sometimes. A unique word or phrase will be used once, and then everyone starts using it - so by the end of the week - the word has saturated every conversation.

Last week it was "woeful." This week it's "jump the shark."

Home Sick = Long Post

Home sick today, and while my limp body is too tired to move, my mind is still very much on warp speed. Let's catch everyone up:

I'm starting to think there's some Criss Angel mind-freak stuff regarding my dreams. As you all know, the American Idol Season 1 Runner-Up was in a recent dream I had. In the same dream, I was a firefighter and picked up ice cream. Well - that very same day I was assigned a segment on the American Idol business phenomenon - and how companies are branding products to be in sync with the show. Guess what company we had on? Dreyer's/Edy's Slow Churned ice cream. Apparently, ice cream has gotten on the Idol bandwagon; They have flavors like Orange-Inal, Cookies 'N Dreamz, etc... So the American Idol and ice cream aspects of my dream the night before were realized. When it comes to the firefighting aspect - I got home that night, and my super had given us new fire safety plans. MIND-FREAK!

I've been out with this dude a couple of times in the last 2 weeks. The pace which I guess we are seeing each other is pretty comfortable. The problem is that during the in-between time when we're not seeing each other, he'll sometimes text me. His favorite thing to text me? ";)" - yep, that'll be it - a smiley faced wink. The first time I got it I thought it was sweet - like, "that's nice, he's thinking of me." The problem is that when I respond via text to his wink - he doesn't get back to me. So then I'm not sure if his cell's in a dead zone or what. So, I guess I find myself in a spot of thinking, "What does the wink mean?" - Thinking of me and that's that? Spurring Text Dialogue? Drunk text? Furthermore, I don't even know this dude's preferred means of communication. Is he just a text man? Or is he an email guy? Maybe he's just winking up a storm to a whole host of chicks in his cell, and responds to the first one to write him back! These are just some of the minutia that can drive NYC women MAD. If I get another smiley face wink on text from this dude, I think I'll throw my phone at the first guy I see. I hate these stupid dating dances. Are we even dating? I don't think so. I have no idea. I have to end it.

Speaking of - This guy came from a Craigslist ad I put up for a movie date one night. I simply wanted to see a movie with someone, and none of my girlfriends would go to "Sweeney Todd" with me. The solo movie trip is also getting pretty old. So I made a post, put it under Women Seeking Men - and within 30 minutes, had like 60 responses. Most of them were perverted responses, yes - but many others seemed like normal enough guys. One never really knows until meeting up, right? I'm currently weeding through the prospectives.

Man - I need some furniture. I had a gentleman-caller over the other night, and I was like, "Would you like to sit on the photograph boxes, or a step stool?" It's just that I'm not seeing anything good or unique - at antique stores or the big stores. I can't yet bring myself to go Scandi and hit IKEA. Plus, I can never put together anything anyway - so the whole assembly thing would be a nightmare. Anyone know of some good places - I'm thinking like warehousey places - to go? There's gotta be something in Brooklyn.

It's only Wednesday, but feels like it should be Friday - but if it were, I'd have to work through the weekend, because in fact - it's only Wednesday. Anyone else feel like this week is just dragging to a halt?

Somebody, Wake Me Up!

I had a dream that I bumped into Justin Guarini and his publicist before he was performing at a gig. He then texted me later - on my new phone - saying he wanted to get together. When I read the text, I was on my way to a fire with my fellow firefighters. But I got off the truck to return to the fire station because he was waiting there for me. I walked about 5 blocks, and got some ice cream for Justin.

WTF?!?!?!?!?!

Why was she wearing this?

It was just - like modern camo.

Chucktatorship

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

My Birthplace: Explaining a Lot About Me

Not Adding Up with "The Economist"

I know what you're thinking... how could there be any problem with the renowned "Economist" mag? Well, there is... big-time.
I renewed a subscription for my brother for Christmas. I was charged twice. When I realized this error and called the mag's subscription service center, they said "Sorry - no problem - we'll credit you back for the one faulty subscription. Courtney Browne, right?" Wrong. My brother's name is not Courtney. I clear this all up in initial phone call. We part ways.

Two weeks later. No credit back yet. I call again. "So sorry, Ms. Browne, we'll credit you back for your order for Courtney Browne." Again, wrong. I try to clear up... speaking as clear as English as I possibly can. Again, met with "Apologies, Ms. Browne, we'll take care of it."

Now - nearly 5 weeks later - and they still haven't cleared up the credit back. And I just received a bill from "The Economist" for a 'Courtney Browne' subscription. I feel very sorry for the subscription person who will field my call tomorrow. For goodness sakes - it's "The Economist" - shouldn't they know how to add/allot and all 'dat?

Super Newser!

Alex is moving 1 block away from me. Happy days on the east side!

Just Thinkin'

- Remember when your friends in college used to have glow-in-the-dark constellation stars on their dorm room ceilings? It was all pretty cool back then. Looking back, not at all.

- "American Idol" is genius. Its initial 2-hour shows (including worst of the worst) - hook you, connect you, and keep you checking in for more.

- On the way to work today, I saw 6 people jogging on my block. You could just smell the resolutions oozing out of their pores.

- Thank goodness for C-Span. How else can I catch up with all the presidential candidates without being at Elsa Cox's farmhouse on Sunday afternoon in Perry, Iowa?

- I can't believe how much I'm learning at my new job. I actually caught myself asking a guest if the so-called "January effect" is relevant for investors who weren't eyeballing small cap stocks. Who says that??? I do.

- Meeting blind date tomorrow night for bar trivia. Hoping that a "January effect" question is nestled somewhere in there...

- My neighbor's dog hates her new boyfriend. She might want to consider the 5-minute barking fits in her deal-breakers list.

NYE 2007

This New Year's with Casey was highly explosive - marked by PBR-hoarding, Williamsburg tour, drag queens & Danger Party, and a ton of random dudes.