An Open Plea: No Joe, Don't Go!

Doorman Joe is leaving our building Wednesday - moving to the dismal state of Maryland with his family. WHY JOE, WHY?
Who's going to wish me luck and check for lipstick on my teeth before a big date?
Who's going to give me an airplane bottle of liquor when I return from the same date - in a puddle of tears?
Who's going to let me use the lobby bathroom when a night-on-the-town means I can't hold it in until my apartment?
Who's going to give me the goods on my neighbors?
Who's going to tell me the best places to park my nonexistent car?
Who's going to be my best friend by telling me my dry cleaning has arrived?
Who's going to talk music and bands with me?
Who's going to always smile - always be upbeat - and always lend a hand?
You were so good to us Joe - I'll miss you forever!
Good luck in The Old Line State - or the Free State - or the Wrong State...