It was just - like modern camo.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Chucktatorship
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
Not Adding Up with "The Economist"
I know what you're thinking... how could there be any problem with the renowned "Economist" mag? Well, there is... big-time.
I renewed a subscription for my brother for Christmas. I was charged twice. When I realized this error and called the mag's subscription service center, they said "Sorry - no problem - we'll credit you back for the one faulty subscription. Courtney Browne, right?" Wrong. My brother's name is not Courtney. I clear this all up in initial phone call. We part ways.
Two weeks later. No credit back yet. I call again. "So sorry, Ms. Browne, we'll credit you back for your order for Courtney Browne." Again, wrong. I try to clear up... speaking as clear as English as I possibly can. Again, met with "Apologies, Ms. Browne, we'll take care of it."
Now - nearly 5 weeks later - and they still haven't cleared up the credit back. And I just received a bill from "The Economist" for a 'Courtney Browne' subscription. I feel very sorry for the subscription person who will field my call tomorrow. For goodness sakes - it's "The Economist" - shouldn't they know how to add/allot and all 'dat?
I renewed a subscription for my brother for Christmas. I was charged twice. When I realized this error and called the mag's subscription service center, they said "Sorry - no problem - we'll credit you back for the one faulty subscription. Courtney Browne, right?" Wrong. My brother's name is not Courtney. I clear this all up in initial phone call. We part ways.
Two weeks later. No credit back yet. I call again. "So sorry, Ms. Browne, we'll credit you back for your order for Courtney Browne." Again, wrong. I try to clear up... speaking as clear as English as I possibly can. Again, met with "Apologies, Ms. Browne, we'll take care of it."
Now - nearly 5 weeks later - and they still haven't cleared up the credit back. And I just received a bill from "The Economist" for a 'Courtney Browne' subscription. I feel very sorry for the subscription person who will field my call tomorrow. For goodness sakes - it's "The Economist" - shouldn't they know how to add/allot and all 'dat?
Monday, January 7, 2008
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Just Thinkin'
- Remember when your friends in college used to have glow-in-the-dark constellation stars on their dorm room ceilings? It was all pretty cool back then. Looking back, not at all.
- "American Idol" is genius. Its initial 2-hour shows (including worst of the worst) - hook you, connect you, and keep you checking in for more.
- On the way to work today, I saw 6 people jogging on my block. You could just smell the resolutions oozing out of their pores.
- Thank goodness for C-Span. How else can I catch up with all the presidential candidates without being at Elsa Cox's farmhouse on Sunday afternoon in Perry, Iowa?
- I can't believe how much I'm learning at my new job. I actually caught myself asking a guest if the so-called "January effect" is relevant for investors who weren't eyeballing small cap stocks. Who says that??? I do.
- Meeting blind date tomorrow night for bar trivia. Hoping that a "January effect" question is nestled somewhere in there...
- My neighbor's dog hates her new boyfriend. She might want to consider the 5-minute barking fits in her deal-breakers list.
- "American Idol" is genius. Its initial 2-hour shows (including worst of the worst) - hook you, connect you, and keep you checking in for more.
- On the way to work today, I saw 6 people jogging on my block. You could just smell the resolutions oozing out of their pores.
- Thank goodness for C-Span. How else can I catch up with all the presidential candidates without being at Elsa Cox's farmhouse on Sunday afternoon in Perry, Iowa?
- I can't believe how much I'm learning at my new job. I actually caught myself asking a guest if the so-called "January effect" is relevant for investors who weren't eyeballing small cap stocks. Who says that??? I do.
- Meeting blind date tomorrow night for bar trivia. Hoping that a "January effect" question is nestled somewhere in there...
- My neighbor's dog hates her new boyfriend. She might want to consider the 5-minute barking fits in her deal-breakers list.
NYE 2007
This New Year's with Casey was highly explosive - marked by PBR-hoarding, Williamsburg tour, drag queens & Danger Party, and a ton of random dudes.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)