Earwax

1) My doctor put me on a no-caffeine diet a few weeks back (can't even drink non-caffeinated drinks!) - and it's horrible. Think about it - I'm in the news. I work insano hours - and I can't get at least one java jolt during the day?

The worst part is - like most things - when you can't have it, you seem to become extremely conscious of everyone that CAN have it. I am either greeted by Thermos-mugged commuters on the subway, sitting next to the Dunkin Donuts coffee nuts at the morning editorial meeting, or constantly hearing "I'm doing a Starbucks run. Who wants what?" at all hours of the day. Why, just the other day, I thought I saw some preschoolers with sippy cups full of coffee!

And just when you thought it couldn't get worse... guess what's also off limits?? Chocolate. You can start crying for me now.

2) I think it's safe to say the SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) party last weekend was a success. We had coconut cups, a pinata, a margarita-machine, great company, and a pretty rad invite, if I do say so myself. Check it out!

3) I'm thinking about getting a dog, and I can't wag the Vizla breed out of my brain. I may make the jump soon.

4) Some of my former professors want me to speak to JMU journalism students next month at the school's annual alumni event. I'm envisioning a panel of sorts - in which young and vibrant, eager-to-break-into-the-biz students gauge me on how to form their resumes, how to land that first job, and how to become the next foreign correspondent. In all cases, I imagine quietly leaning into the microphone and whispering, "Get Out."

5) I get about 2,000 emails a day. Most of it is from PR-types and publicists, who want to TELL me who I should have on for a particular segment. It would be different if they craftily delivered a great release, engaging me - bringing me in to their story and guest's background - giving me everything that will fit in a 10-second attention span. Instead, I get crap like this:

"Hi,

I just want to remind you that Bob Moulton, president of the Americana Mortgage Group, a 20+-year financial, banking and real estate veteran and one of the most prolific residential mortgage brokers in the country, is available to discuss today’s pending home sales numbers. In light of the volatility and downturn in the housing markets as well as all of the speculation about the Fed, interest rates, the tightening of credit, the upheaval in the mortgage market and the looming specter of a potential recession, these numbers can offer some interesting insights about the immediate and long-term economic future.

Moulton’s Americana Mortgage Group serves the Northeast and Florida markets.

Bob Moulton would be happy to provide you with his thought-provoking commentary and insights about this report. Please let me know if you would like to speak with him."

You lost me at prolific. Seriously, draw me in - and *sell* it to me. And please, please, please - don't ever tag the email as a priority. One glimpse of that red exclamation point, and I delete!